Short Fuse
© 1992/2016 by K Pelle
Chapter 11
I was still in a very quiet mood when we got to the doctor's office. In fact, Arlene had to speak loudly to break me out of my deep thoughts.
We'd only been there a few minutes when I was whisked into an examining room, leaving Arlene to wait for me. Then once I was in the examining room, I'd hardly picked up a year old copy of 'The Reader's Digest' before Doctor Franklin came in.
"Well hello, Dave. I hear you've had a rather eventful weekend."
"You could say that," I answered as I stood up.
"Dave, I can't see the wound on your head when you're standing up. You'll have to sit down on the stool," he gestured to a rolling stool that he often sat on himself. "First I'd like to take off that bandage and see just what we're dealing with."
So I sat back down and he removed the bandage wrapped around my head, then took off the pad that covered the small wound above my ear.
"This doesn't look bad. Any headaches?"
"Not really, not after the first night."
"Good, is your vision clear? No blurring or haziness?"
"As good as it ever was."
"Dizziness or nausea?"
"Nope, not since the first couple of hours after I got hurt."
"Well, I think you're lucky," he said quietly. "We'll run a couple of tests but I think you can go back to most normal activities. Now, I understand that you've had a few other problems in your life. Are they bothering you?"
"Well, I'm under a lot of pressure, I suppose. I notice my temper is a bit short."
"I see. Are you sleeping well?"
"Surprisingly yes. Once I get to sleep."
"Well, I'm going to give you a small prescription for some pills that will help you to relax. I'll also give you a few pills that will help you get to sleep, but in your case, I think you're quite stable, so you may not need them. I think you should try to reestablish a regular routine, eat a balanced diet, get some exercise, and do your best to handle the stress without taking the pills. If you do have to take the pills, don't worry, they aren't habit forming in the small quantity that I'm going to give to you."
"So I should just take them if I feel like I can't cope?"
"That's the idea," he smiled. "I'm going to put an adhesive bandage on this wound above your ear. Change it twice daily and come back to see me in three or four days."
"That's it?"
"Yes, that's it," he said quietly as he applied a small bandaid over my ear. "I think your wound is healing well. Now, still sitting where you are, tell me the last line you can read on that eye chart on the far wall."
"Well, in the bottom right corner there's a stylized manufacturer's mark that I can't make out too well but the words following it say 'Printed in Canada' followed by a tiny, red maple leaf."
He stepped closer and looked down, then shook his head as he turned to me. "If you had to guess, what would you say that the manufacturer's mark might be?"
"It looks like a letter 'T' superimposed on top of a letter 'S', I think."
"Well, there's nothing wrong there," he said, then he sighed. "I only wish I had your eyesight."
While I was there, he checked my pulse rate, took my blood pressure and a few other things. All the while he was asking me questions, making notes and writing out a prescription. Finally, he opened a locked drawer and gave me a few pharmaceutical samples.
"These are sleeping pills," he held out one small packet of pills. "Take one tablet a night if you can't get to sleep in an hour or two after retiring."
Then he held out another two packets. "These are antidepressants and are identical to the ones I have given you the prescription to buy. These samples are for you to use until you get the prescription filled. In either case, only use them if you feel you're not capable of handling things on your own. No more than two pills in any six-hour period."
I nodded and took the little packets as well as the prescription.
Then he took my hand and shook it solemnly. "You know you have my sympathies. Now I realize that your life is going to be hectic for the next few days, but I want you to call back in a day or two to make an appointment. I want to see you again before the weekend."
I just nodded, still not knowing what to say to an expression of sympathy. He clapped his hand on my shoulder and suddenly turned to leave to get on with his next patient. I was left staring at his departing back.
I stopped at the reception desk for long enough to explain that I would have to phone for an appointment in the next few days, then Arlene and I left.
"Well?" she said once we were out on the street.
"My head seems to be healing well. I'm to change the bandaid every day. He gave me some pills if I can't sleep and some other pills in case I get feeling too edgy, but he advised me not to use either of them unless I have to. Oh, and I have to come back to see him later in the week; you probably heard me talking to the receptionist about that."
"So you can drive again?"
I just nodded. "He said I needed to reestablish a routine, to eat a balanced diet, and to try to relax. Other than that, he didn't put any limitations on my actions."
"And he advised you not to take the pills?" she questioned.
"Yeah, only if I need them. He's been my doctor for years and one reason that I like him is because he's not a pill pusher."
"Well, he's impressed me already," she laughed softly. "I don't suppose he needs a couple of more patients?"
"I think he's probably busy as 'H' already, but I can ask when I see him later in the week if you want?"
"Actually, I prefer to have a woman doctor," she smiled as we came to her car. "Want to drive?"
"Umm, no actually, I don't. I trust your driving," I paused. "Say, did you bring your portable phone with you?"
"Yes, why?"
"Well, my lawyer's office is just around the corner. I was thinking I should phone and see if there was a message at your house. Then perhaps we could drop by my lawyer's and talk to him in person."
"Good point," she handed me the cell phone.
Cindy answered my call on the second ring. The lawyer hadn't phoned, but she said that the police station had called and wanted to talk to me and to Arlene as well. We decided that it was easier to drive there, and talk to them in person than it was to call them on the phone since we were right downtown already.
"Did Cindy say who had called?" Arlene asked.
"No and I forgot to ask," I admitted.
"Well, we'll stop at the front desk and find out," she shrugged as she wove through downtown traffic far faster than I would have driven.
"Just one question, don't news reporters hang out there?"
"Oh shit! Good point. I think I'd better pull over and call in," she said as we whipped across a lane and we pulled into the parking lot of a strip-mall.
"Wow, remind me never to try to follow you," I gasped.
"Sorry," she snapped, lifting the phone to her ear.
"Hello, this is Detective Arlene Banks, someone left word at my home that I was to call in," she paused. "Yes, I'm about three blocks away and he's with me, but I was wondering, are there any reporters around the station?"
I looked at her and realized she was wearing her 'Police' face again. I was trying to notice what was different, and she caught me looking at her, raising her eyebrows in a question as she listened on the phone.
"Later," I whispered.
"You were right. We'd have walked into a hornet's nest," she said quietly, holding her hand over the receiver. "They do want to see us though."
"Is there a back door?"
"The press caught onto that years ago," she smiled. "Good point though."
Then her attention went back to the telephone and she grinned at me as she set down the phone.
"Feel like having a cup of coffee and a donut?" she asked, already underway.
"Pardon?"
"There's a 'Timmy's just down the road from the station," she grinned. "Dick is going to meet us there."
"Well, won't there be just as many reporters there?"
"Possibly, but if there are, they won't bother us. It's a long-standing tradition that Tim Horton's is neutral territory. If they bother us there, they know we'll spread the word and any cooperation they had before will dry up," she smiled. "Of course that's only inside the building, while we're crossing the parking lot, we're fair game."
I just shook my head.
A few minutes later, as we sat at a corner table with a cup of coffee, we were joined by Detective Fairchild who handed me an envelope as soon as he sat down.
"Good morning," he said quietly. "That envelope has copies of the death certificates for your wife and her mother. Your lawyer called and said you'd need them, and I slipped in a photocopy of your mother-in-law's will too, since it was there in the house and handy."
"Thank you."
"No problem," he waved his hand as if waving off the thanks. "Now, while I have you here, I can update you on the latest findings about your wife and mother-in-law if you'd like."
I just looked at him and nodded, then I felt Arlene shift slightly and suddenly her hand was holding mine. Detective Fairchild pulled a small black notepad out of his pocket and opened it.
"Okay, this is preliminary, but I'm fairly sure it's relatively accurate," he said quietly after looking around to see that no one was close. "One of the neighbours heard a loud argument between Mrs Leech and another woman not long after your wife arrived there. Then not more than an hour later, she noticed the sound of a car engine, but from her position she couldn't see for sure if it was your wife's vehicle since that was parked in the enclosed car port. We do suspect that was when your wife first started the vehicle."
"You see we also have the preliminary results from the autopsy. Both of the women were dosed heavily with sleeping pills. In the old lady's case, the vial that held the prescription for them was laying on the floor near her chair, but it was empty. There was another empty vial that had held sleeping pills and a water glass at your wife's side in the van."
"Laying on the kitchen table was an envelope that held a copy of the old lady's will. There had been a recent update to it that which gave almost everything the old lady owned to Shannon Gamble in the event of the old woman's death, and that included her house. It was as if she'd cut your wife out of the will as completely as she could," he sighed deeply. "We think they may have argued over that, then things went downhill from there."
"It looks as if your wife took sleeping pills knowing that she would fall asleep and that the exhaust fumes would fill the van with carbon monoxide fumes because it was parked in such a tight space. The way she was parked, her mother could look out the window, and see what was happening. Perhaps she thought that her mother would come rescue her, or that she'd call for help."
"Her mother did call someone. As you know, she called you and left a message on your answering machine. Unfortunately, you were in the hospital at the time. Since Mrs. Leech suffered so badly from agoraphobia, we've assumed that she felt she couldn't bear to go outside to help her own daughter. We think she watched out the window as her daughter died and we believe that it may have driven her over the brink. The old lady seems to have committed suicide by taking a dose of sleeping pills and pain killers, then slashing her own wrists. We've deduced that your wife was already dead by then, just from the discrepancies in the time of death of the two bodies."
I simply stared at him for several seconds, then I shook my head slowly when he remained silent.
"You're making that sound as if Claire intentionally drove her mother to suicide," I whispered. "Do you really think that's what happened?"
"Oh, I wouldn't jump to that conclusion," he said quietly. "It may well be that your wife was simply not thinking clearly. We even considered that her mother might have given her the sleeping pills. However, when we analysed the residue in each woman's stomach, we found that each of them had a slightly different drug in their system. In other words it was definitely two different prescriptions."
"Claire did use sleeping pills once in a while," I admitted. "I couldn't really say about her mother though."
"Well, you can take it from me that she did; the prescription on the bottle at her side was in her name," he shrugged then he frowned. "There is one other thing, the chief hasn't been able to calm down the news people, so even meeting you here is risky. Now, I was wondering if you'd like us to have your car towed to a neutral spot? I imagine you'd like some independence."
I felt my mood change. Just the mention of the press was bothering me. Actually the fact that they were trying to interfere with my life was angering me.
"I was going to rent a car for a few days, but you know, this whole idea of running from the press is pissing me off!" I growled. "I've got half an idea to walk into the front office of 'The Clarion' and sound off about what they're doing to my life. I'm not very good at hiding."
"I don't think I'd advise that," he said quietly. "It's been tried before."
Arlene's hand had reached out and was resting on my arm. "Dave, the press feeds on sensation, and right now, you're news because of what's happened."
"No, I am not!" I growled, pulling my hand away. "I'm not news. Instead I'm a victim of circumstance. All of this was precipitated by a rapist, who was also a paedophile, and my dead wife's reaction to that rape attempt. Neither I nor my daughter did anything wrong and yet the press is out to make us into a sensation. I admit that Claire's reaction wasn't the most stable, but damn it, that was her reaction, not mine."
"Now Dave . . ." Arlene started to say.
"Don't 'now Dave' me," I growled. "This whole situation has to stop. I will not hide from those bastards. First, I want to talk to my lawyer, then I'm going to make a statement to the press, and after that if I am harassed by them, I'll sue each and every one of those who harass me."
"Dave, they'll just quote the laws about 'freedom of the press' to you and write a scathing article about you. They'll dig up dirt from your past life and make you look like a criminal."
"Huh, fat chance," I snapped. "The only contact with the police I've had in the past fifteen years has been with you two. I never cheated on my wife, in fact I can't recall ever cheating on anything. I've never stolen anything and the only place I've ever been violent was on the playing field, where violence was part of the sport. I don't drink heavily. I don't do drugs. I've never smoked. My worst habit is liking an occasional cup of coffee. There is no dirt in my past life for them to dig up."
"Then they'll try to make you look dirty by association," Dick said quietly.
"And every time they do, I'll shoot them down. I don't even have any friends or associates that are lawbreakers," I growled. "Freedom of the press should not override the freedom of privacy. Hell, I'm willing to make it a political campaign if necessary."
We sat and argued for almost an hour, then I insisted that Arlene either take me to my lawyer's office or I was going to call a cab. She relented and agreed to drive me, but in the car on the way there, both Arlene and I were totally silent until we pulled in and parked.
"Arlene, this isn't your fight," I said quietly. "It isn't Shannon's fight either. I think I'll move into a motel for now, but could Shannon stay with you?"
"Of course she can," Arlene said quietly. "I want you to know that I think you're wrong to try this, simply because I think the press will cream you. However at the same time, I have to admit that I hope you win out. If it wasn't for my job, I'd be fighting right beside you."
"Thanks, now lets go see if my lawyer thinks I have a leg to stand on,"
Both Arlene and I went into my lawyer's office that morning and I suppose that whole episode was somewhat astonishing for Arlene. To start with Jaro's secretary/receptionist was an original. In the first place she was black as the ace of spades and secondly she was a descendent of the pygmies from Africa, she was definitely not a person most people would expect to see in a lawyer's office. Since she was a miniature version of a normal woman - well except that Peg had a huge bust for someone so small - I think she took Arlene totally by surprise.
Then introducing Arlene to Santos Jarosinski was interesting to say the least. To me, Jaro was just Jaro and because I'd known him so long I hadn't thought to warn Arlene in any way. His looks often took people by surprise and I'd forgotten the effect he had on most people, but then I'd had him for a friend all through University and he'd been my lawyer since he first put out his shingle. However it's not often that you meet a man in a wheelchair who might have stood perhaps four feet tall, if he had been able to stand, but then both his legs are badly deformed, so you seldom see him trying to stand. On top of that, to describe Jaro's face you'd have to say that he looked almost as if he'd lost an argument with a cement truck, but behind that ruined face sat one of the keenest minds that I'd ever run across.
He had grown used to people's reaction to him, so he wasn't fazed by Arlene's look of astonishment, instead he greeted me with a grin and an outstretched hand. By the time I had introduced him and he was shaking Arlene's hand, she seemed to have recovered from the shock of meeting both Peg and Jaro though. Then he waved us both to a seat as he wheeled himself behind his desk and began scrabbling through the papers that lay there. I complicated matters by handing him the envelope from the police, and he just nodded his thanks.
"This is quite a muddle that you've fallen into, Dave," he smiled at me. "I hear that you've even been hiding out from the press."
"Maybe not for much longer," I answered sharply. "I was wondering if you'd like to tackle a case on that issue as well. I don't like being harassed by them and I don't want my family and friends harassed by them either."
"Uh, oh. I see they have your temper up. That's not a good thing Dave. They do have the freedom of the press on their side, you know."
"Jaro, you ain't seen nothing yet," I growled. "If they start to bother me, I want to slap them with a harassment suit. Just in case, I want to legally invoke some sort of privacy barrier to keep them out of my life and anything that I feel is my personal business. I and my daughter have done nothing wrong and yet they already have us hiding out like common criminals."
"Let me think about that for a bit, I may have an idea or two. First however, there are a few things we need to take care of," he said quietly as he shifted a few pieces of paper on his desk. "To be blunt, your wife's will was changed recently and she tried to cut you out of it completely. She left a few thousand dollars to the SPCA and the remainder was split between her mother and your daughter. If you want, we can fight that in court, but since Claire's mother left everything to Shannon, I'm not sure if it's worth it to you."
"Nope, it isn't," I shook my head. "Can you set up a trust for Shannon of some sort? Something that will guarantee that she gets a good sized nest egg when she needs it, probably after she moves away from home."
"Are you still planning on taking care of Shannon's education?"
"You know it," I growled. "Hell, you're the guy who set up the fund for that."
"Yes, I know. I was wondering if you realized how much money was in that account?"
"I do, everything from my third book. Now back to Claire and her mother, what about funerals?"
"Ah yes, there was a provision in both wills for burial, so that will be taken care of by their solicitor's. You really don't have to do anything if you don't wish to."
"Oh, I'm not sure we even want to have a funeral as such," I sighed. "Can they do an interment without a funeral? All a funeral would do would be to draw the press."
"Dave, I think you need a funeral of some sort and so does Shannon," Arlene interjected. "I think both of you need some kind of closure."
"I believe I agree with Ms. Banks," Jaro smiled sympathetically. "I realize that you probably feel anger and frustration right now, but I think you also need to say goodbye to the woman who bore your child and helped raise her. Shannon may well need closure even more than you do."
"I suppose. I think I need to talk to Shannon about that."
"By the way, how is she standing up?" Jaro asked quietly.
"So far, she's done better than I have," I sighed. "To be honest, I don't think it's sunk in yet."
"Dave, I think she comprehends everything that's happened, but she's been holding up around you, since she can see how it's affecting you. I think she's holding everything in, because she doesn't want to be an added burden on you right now," Arlene said quietly.
I just stared at Arlene in surprise, realizing that I'd missed that possibility almost completely.
"Well, to change the subject, I took the liberty of calling Claire's former place of employment to explain the situation to them. Surprisingly, I found that she had mailed them a letter of resignation late last week and that it had arrived just prior to my call this morning," Jaro changed the subject. "I would imagine that's also a surprise to you. It certainly was to me."
"Yeah, it is," I said quietly. "I wonder what she was planning to do?"
"We'll probably never know," he shook his head. "I believe she might have been slightly unstable, but that's not something we can check in any way."
"Yeah, I can believe the unstable part," I nodded my head. "Oh, by the way, did you get my call about the insurance company and the house cleanup?"
"Ah yes. On that note, the insurance company has offered to wash and repaint all the walls and trim, replace all curtains and drapes, all carpets, your office furniture and shelving. They will also replace or repair anything else that they find was damaged, either by the fire or by the firemen who controlled it. They surprised me by offering to include replacement of as many of the books as they can find on the market and they will try to deodorize any of the books and papers that they cannot replace. They admit that their agent went beyond his authority in contacting you and trying to put you in a position where the press would have access to you. I'd say they want to make amends out of fear of a lawsuit since you've turned contact over to me. The last word is that they have set an estimated date of Friday for you to be able to take possession of your home again"
"Good," I growled. "Which brings us back to the subject of the press. I want them out of my affairs and I don't want them hounding me. I've been the victim in this whole situation and I don't want them to victimize me or mine any further."
"Victimize. That's an interesting choice of words," he smiled like a cat, more of a snarl than a smile. "I was wondering if you might want me to handle a news conference of sorts. That would mean that you were personally kept out of the press coverage, yet you could dictate exactly what was revealed to them, and what was kept secret."
"The police would want to be involved," Arlene added. "After all, this is a murder/suicide investigation."
"Would you be one of the officers in attendance?" he asked.
"I'd prefer not to be asked. Dick Fairchild would be the detective to contact. If I was involved in talking to the press, it might be regarded as a conflict of interest. I have a personal involvement that might affect the discussion, since Dave and Shannon have been staying with me up until now."
"Up until now?"
"Yes, Dave thinks he should move into a motel to protect me and my family from any possible harassment by the press,"
"Hmm, I don't see that as a good idea for several reasons."
"Why not?" I demanded.
"Well, since the press is aware that your house has been damaged, they will automatically be checking around for a man and his daughter checking into a motel. There's a fair chance that they'd find you. Secondly, Arlene is a police officer and can provide you with some protection and information that wouldn't be available in a motel. On top of that, having a friend to lean on at a time like this is worth a lot."
"I'm more worried about what effect it would have on Shannon," Arlene added. "At my house she has Cindy, Mom, and me to lean on, as well as you. As it is, she feels that she's protecting you, so if you go to a motel, she's going to insist on coming with you, even if she doesn't really want to. Besides, all the people I know in the press would be leery of making a police officer annoyed by invading that cop's personal territory. At my house you can at least relax, which is something you really couldn't do in a motel. If you were at a hotel or motel you would be looking over your shoulder constantly."
I suppose I made some sort of sound then that Arlene interpreted as me being stubborn and she reacted. She made a funny sort of growling sound in her throat, then almost leaped to her feet and walked swiftly to the door.
"I'll be in the outer office," she snapped as she went out.
"Oops, what did I do?" I asked quietly.
"Well, I don't know if you realize it or not, but that lady wants what's best for you," Jaro said softly. "I really do think you should reconsider this idea of yours about moving out of her home."
"Jaro, you just don't understand," I sighed. "That woman is just about everything I could ever want in a woman and it feels so damn wrong. Claire is hardly cold for cripes sake, and here I am getting the hots for another woman. Then on top of everything else, I'm worried that right now I could lose my cool, or do something stupid that would chase her away forever. I certainly don't want that either."
"So you do want to be involved with her?"
"Yeah," I admitted.
"And you think she likes you too?"
"Oh yeah, she said so, quite frankly and in plain English."
"But you want to pull back right now for some reason?"
"I don't want to screw up. If I screw up it might hurt her, which might end my chance of getting together with her after my life calms down and gets back to normal."
He just shook his head slowly, and rubbed his chin with his fingers then he frowned at me. "Dave, that woman is a cop. She knows the kind of crap you're going through and she wants to help you. I think you should take the time to accept that she cares about you and you should take her offer of help. I'm quite sure she'd be willing to make just about any concession right now in order to make you feel more comfortable. My personal feeling is that you'd be an idiot not to accept her offer to help, and the fact that she cares for you. I think right now you should go out and apologize to her, then bring her back in here so we can finish off our business. If we take too long, this visit is going to cost you a fortune."
I just sat there and looked at him for a minute. What he was saying was what I wanted to hear, yet it still wasn't that reassuring to me. Still, after a moment's thought, I got to my feet, and went out to apologize to Arlene.
"You all ready to go?" she asked and I could see her eyes looked red.
"Not quite. Jaro talked me into apologizing to you for being a dope, and we still need your input so . . ."
"Are you still planning on going to a motel?" she demanded.
I just shook my head. At that she grabbed my hand, and led me back into Jaro's inner office.
"I've been doing some thinking about the idea of a press release. Arlene, do you think it would be convenient for your detective Fairchild if we did that in the police station parking lot?" he asked immediately.
"In the parking lot?" she said in surprise. "Why not inside? I'm sure he could swing a conference room for that."
"No. I want it in the parking lot. I don't want them to be comfortable and I certainly don't want those vultures making a nuisance of themselves inside the police station," he grinned, all teeth and no humour. "Now what I was thinking was to give them a corrected repetition of the details that they've already published. Then I'd like to ask your friend Dick Fairchild to make a very minimal statement. After that I plan to simply say 'no comment' to any questions on my way to my car."
"In other words, tell them nothing?"
"That's about it. I'd like to leave out the fact that it was Claire who struck Dave, but play up the fact that Dave was taken to the hospital. I can infer that it was because he was injured after a fire broke out at his home without actually lying. Then I'd like to play up the fact that two of Dave's family members died, but not mention that it was either a murder/suicide or a double suicide. To end my short speech, I'd like to say something about the fact that Dave and Shannon are extremely thankful for the friends and family that have stepped forward during their time of need and that they will be sending out thank-you notes at a more appropriate time."
Jaro had been looking at Shannon as he spoke, then he turned toward me.
"Dave, I don't want to say anything about where you're staying. I don't want to say anything directly about the fact that you want to be left alone. Yet I want to convey the idea that you are simply remaining out of contact at the present time because of grief, as well as both mental and physical trauma. Hopefully I can convince the detective to simply tell the press that since the matter is still under investigation, he can't comment on it."
"Since it will still be under investigation, that won't be a problem," Arlene smiled,
"I suppose that will be good enough," I said quietly. "I'd like to have told them off for trying to waylay me at my own house. Especially since they did it by going through that stupid insurance adjuster."
"Well, if you'd like, I could happen to mention that because of that incident you have become shy of any dealings with the press. We could even mention that we might be considering legal action against all parties involved in the duplicity," he smiled, a shark's smile that I remembered from the poker games we used to get involved in at the University. "Just the idea that we might be going after some of them might give the others second thoughts. Of course it also might become a challenge for some of the more rash individuals."
"I don't think you should mention anything about a possible lawsuit," Arlene opined. "And I'm not sure about even mentioning that insurance adjuster either. After all, from the sounds of it the insurance company is trying its best to make up for the problem. Perhaps you could mention the idea that he heard about the fact that the press was waiting for him from the neighbours or something."
I nodded my head. There was no way I wanted to goose some young photographer into becoming a pain in the butt because I'd unintentionally issued a challenge.
"I did talk to the woman across the street from my house, so you wouldn't be lying either."
Jaro just chuckled and began to lay out exactly what he planned on saying for my approval. Ten minutes later, we were on our way down to Arlene's car and fifteen minutes after that, we were at a rental car lot.
As we'd been driving over, Arlene had been driving much slower than earlier and I could see that she had something on her mind. Somehow I simply didn't want to talk, at least not in the car. If I was going to unload my feelings, I wanted to be outside and away from people.
When we pulled into the lot, I glanced at the cars that were there for rent and immediately made up my mind to rent the same make and model as I owned. Arlene suggested that I make sure it was a different colour, but agreed with me that I didn't want to have to get used to a car with different driving characteristics than my own in my present circumstances.
The actual rental went quickly, and as we walked out to the rental car, I suggested to Arlene that I'd like to pick up a portable phone so that we could remain in touch even if we were in different cars or different places. That drew a smile from her, as well as a suggestion of where to buy one. She suggested that we both go to the place where she'd purchased hers because as a regular customer, she'd get preferential treatment and I could reap the benefit.
She also told me something I hadn't realized about the portable phone she carried. It seemed that they were actually called cellular telephones or cellphones and they were a relatively recent development that was being tested in our area before being made available on a wider basis. The main reason she found hers handy was that each one was independent of any other phone and there was no crossover to another portable like there were on regular radio phones. On top of that they could call directly to a regular telephone, which a normal radio phone couldn't do. The detectives in the police department had a special deal on them, but normal people could use them as well, they just weren't too popular yet because they were more expensive than a normal phone and local coverage was limited.
I felt that one would be perfect for me, because it gave me a new phone and a new number which wasn't easily traceable by the idiots from the newspapers. Hang the expense, I wanted one.
After we'd taken the time to buy a cell phone, I realized that I'd been stalling. I finally got up the nerve to suggest that we go to a local park that I knew wouldn't be busy. I wanted to talk to her when the girls weren't around, and I knew that Arlene had things she wanted to say as well. Only a short time later we were walking along the crest of Bear Hill park. The sun was hot that day and after the walk up the hill, I suggested that we sit in the shade and rest for a while.
"Okay, if that's what you want," she answered quietly. "Just what is going on?"
"I'm confused and I need to talk it out," I admitted. "My feelings are riding on a yoyo, one minute I'm angry and the next minute I want to cry. Then I look at you and I know I'm doing okay, but at the same time I'm afraid I'll hurt you in some way. It's a totally foreign sensation to me because I usually stay completely in control of my emotions."
"Sometimes I wish I did," she smiled. "Just look at me. I'm a cop. We aren't supposed to get involved with the people that we come in contact with while we're on the job. Instead of that I had you in my bed only a day after I met you. That decision was based on pure emotion. Both Dick and the Police Chief bawled me out about doing it, saying it verged on conflict of interest. The only excuse I could use was that I was on holidays. Since I wasn't on duty, I feel that it was my business what I did in my free time."
"Oh man, will there be repercussions?"
"Probably in some small way, but nothing major. It's not like it hasn't happened before with other people," she sighed and made a wiping motion with her hand. "Now don't blame yourself. It isn't as if any of this was your idea. Remember it was because Shannon was close friends with Cindy that she asked to come to my house in the first place. After that first real contact between us, things just snowballed."
"Yeah, I noticed," I sighed. "You aren't the only one who was affected."
She smiled and took my hand in hers as I stared into her eyes. I squeezed her hand gently.
"I've never felt this way about anyone," I admitted quietly. "I think perhaps I may be falling in love with someone for the first time in my life. Even though you're a wonderful person, it scares me. I know that with all the things that have gone on, I'm not myself right now and I'm so scared that I might hurt you in some way by doing something stupid. On the other hand, I don't want you to lose patience with me for being too slow and too timid. As it is, I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. I'm afraid to do anything, yet I'm afraid that if I don't do something, you might . . ."
"Oh shut up and kiss me," she whispered.
I decided as I was kissing her that I didn't care what the world thought. I didn't even care what my family thought, all I cared about was that this woman should be with me to face life. She managed to convey the same idea to me wordlessly, using her lips and body to let me know that although she was ready for more, she wasn't pushing me to move faster. Several minutes passed before we broke for air. Then we sat there grinning at each other like fools. I was about to speak when her cell phone rang. She looked at me apologetically as she lifted it to her ear.
"Hello," she answered.
"Yes Cindy, what's wrong?" her face twisted into a deep frown.
"We're on our way," she snapped the cell phone shut and turned to me. "Shannon is crying. In fact she's been crying since we left the house and she won't listen to Mom or Cindy. Right now she's sobbing so hard that she's holding her stomach because it hurts."
"Let's go," I snapped and started down the hill.
I've never run so hard in my life and if you consider the fact that I'd spent four years of my life playing halfback on a university football team, that statement means quite a lot.